;unless Allah pleases;
Being a young adult doesn’t mean you’re too young to
make a decision but not too old to play a weird games. Seventeen always be
somethin’ great, I guess, no need a long explanation, I just think that, this
is the part when we’ll change into a mature person. But we’re even not to touch
twenty yet.
Being around of people with a different age, made my thought
changing a bit. When I was a little I always thought that I should be around in
the same age, neither the old nor the young one. Pardon my stupidness. Honestly
I feel so grateful I choose homeschooling, being a homeschooling doesn’t make me feel too
lonely, anyway. I just don’t be around of
people that isn’t in the same age with me. I found somethin’ great that
isn’t at school, but in a real world.
Sometimes I meet a really great
person with a big motivation in their live, and I feel so lucky of that, coz I
can learn from them, perhaps I can be as great as them. But seriously sometimes
it’s hard too when you’re tryna to be good, Allah gives another ‘present’ to us
that we can’t stand for it anymore, and I believe that everyone will be like
this, think that our problem as big as world, nevertheless I believe to that we
can pass it as time goes by.
Honestly I feel sad too if I lose
my old friends, I mean lost contacts, and when I tryna fix it, it just can’t.
no matter how hard I try, everytime I meet them it just feel so different
between the old one. I can feel the awkwardness between our conversation, I
just don’t feel same when they said it’s fun but I don’t think it is.
Or at the past I'm not too close
with them but right now, I just feel same like them, suddenly I feel so happy
around them, and we both just talk no matter how weird the conversation, I just
don’t care about that.
But for those who’s comin’ and
goin’ in my life I really thankful for you guys, and I feel so sorry if I
always do something that make you thought I’ve been changing, but everyone’s
changing right? Either become good one or bad one, it’s all depends on
ourselves. And I give you guys a freedom to think that I’m became a good one or
the bad, seriously I don’t care anymore about it. I just feel so tired changing
myself to become what you want because this is my life.
I just wish that becoming
seventeen will make me grateful for everything.